Tested Love: A Christian Romance (The True Love Series Book 2) Page 3

  “We’ll sort this out, Tessa. It’ll be okay, you’ll see.” Ben’s voice was soft and loving.

  Tessa nodded and wiped her eyes. She lifted her head and looked into his eyes. “I just want Jayden to be happy, Ben.”

  “I know, Tess, but this had to be done. He did the wrong thing.” Their eyes were locked as Ben brushed Tessa’s damp hair off her face.

  She held Ben’s gaze for a moment longer before leaning her head against his shoulder. Although she loved Ben with all her heart, it still didn’t change the fact she didn’t agree with him. Tessa’s heart was torn. She sighed heavily. She could do no more. Jayden was Ben’s son, and she had no right to interfere. She’d have to trust his judgment, even if she didn’t like it. She drew in a deep, slow breath and squeezed her eyes shut, forcing the tears lurking just behind them away. Oh God, please give me wisdom and strength. Help me love both Ben and Jayden. I don’t want to go against either of them, you know that, but it seems I’m caught in the middle.

  She drew in a calming breath and pulled herself slowly away, once again meeting his gaze. Her pulse quickened when he leaned down and kissed her slowly on the lips.

  A short while later, Ben followed her into the kitchen, gently placing his hands on her shoulders as she stood in front of the bench. “Let me help, Tess.” Ben’s deep voice and his lips on the curve of her neck sent a tingle through her body. She breathed in slowly. They would survive this.

  Tessa reached into the cupboard and pulled out three plates. Turning around, a slow smile formed on her face. “Okay, take these.” Their eyes met. She leaned up and gave him another slow kiss before handing him the plates.

  Ben took them and started setting the table.

  Tessa stood on the other side of the kitchen counter. As she checked the vegetables, her thoughts turned to Jayden upstairs. “Is he going to be all right, Ben?”

  Ben paused, salt and pepper shakers in hand. “I hope so, Tess. I really do.” He sighed heavily and glanced upstairs before finishing the table.

  “What else can I do to help?” He slid his arms around Tessa’s waist from behind.

  “Mash the potatoes.”

  “Where’s the masher?” He kissed her neck.

  “In the drawer.” Tessa let out a small laugh. If only it were just the two of them, they would have such a wonderful time. But it wasn’t. She’d known what she was taking on when she accepted Ben’s proposal, but she hadn’t expected it to be quite like this. “Shall I see if Jayden wants to come down to dinner?”

  Ben stopped mashing and glanced towards the stairs. “Might be best if you go instead of me.” He gave her a grateful smile as he picked up the masher and attacked the potatoes.

  Tessa hesitated outside Jayden’s room. Music, if you could call it that, blared out at her. Tessa knocked once with no response. She knocked again, this time much louder. Still no response.

  She opened the door a fraction. Jayden lay face down on his bed, his body racked by the occasional sob. Her heart went out to him. She wanted to take him in her arms and hold him tight, but she hesitated. He probably would only push her away. If only she could make everything right.

  “Dinner’s ready, Jayden.” Her voice was soft and caring. “Will you come down and join us?”

  He turned his face to the wall. “I’m not hungry.”

  Tessa grimaced. Should she make him come down or wait it out? God, what should I do? Her parents would never have let her or Elliott dictate to them even through their testing teenage years. But this wasn’t the time to force the issue. She’d go downstairs and wait. It would only be her and Ben at the dinner table again tonight.

  Ben looked up expectantly as Tessa returned alone. She shook her head and knew the heaviness in her heart was written on her face.

  As Tessa and Ben ate their dinner, Jayden’s empty chair and place setting highlighted his absence. Tessa prayed that Ben’s tough stance wouldn’t have a long-term negative effect on Jayden, but she feared it might.

  When Ben finished eating, he placed his knife and fork neatly together on his plate and wiped his mouth with his napkin. “Thanks Tess, that was lovely.”

  “Thank you, Ben.” Tessa let out a small laugh. Ben was always so polite, but her cooking still left a lot to be desired.

  “Tess, we haven’t decided what church we’re going to yet.”

  “Do we have to talk about that now?” They’d skirted the issue several times, and now with Jayden on her mind it was the last thing Tessa wanted to think about. Besides, Ben had indicated he wasn’t keen on her church, and she wasn’t keen on his, so they were at a stalemate.

  “I think so, Tess. It’s time we decided.” He leaned back in his chair and folded his arms.

  “Okay then, what are you thinking?” Tessa resigned herself to hearing what she didn’t want to hear.

  “We have three choices. My church, your church, or we start afresh at a new one. I’m thinking we should start at a new one.”

  A new one? Tessa straightened. That could be the best option, although she’d miss Gracepointe. A change might also be good for Jayden. He hadn’t been keen of late. And maybe it’d be fun starting a new church together.

  “I think you’re right, Ben. Do you have one in mind?”

  Ben leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table, his eyes brightening. “I’ve done some checking—a guy from work used to go to the Fellowship Bible Church not far from here. He enjoyed it, and it’s close by, so I think it’s worth a try.”

  “Sounds good, Ben.” Tessa smiled warmly at him and squeezed his arm. She prayed that this might be the start of something good for them all.

  Chapter 5

  “Hurry up and get dressed, Jayden.” Tessa carried the dirty Sunday morning breakfast dishes past him and into the kitchen. Jayden followed her sullenly. Ever since Ben had grounded him, he’d been even more moody and non-communicative towards both of them.

  “I am dressed.”

  Tessa glanced at his ripped jeans and t-shirt and her nose wrinkled in disapproval. He’d just finished feeding Bindy and Sparky, and the mud he’d picked up from the walk they’d taken earlier with the dogs had dried into dirty stains. Not a good look for making a first impression at a new church. “Why don’t you put on something a little more presentable for church? The service starts at nine and we don’t want to be late.”

  “I don’t want to go to church.” Jayden held her gaze with a defiant look on his face.

  Tessa refrained from responding straight away, but narrowed her eyes as she held his gaze. Jayden was skilled at winding her up, but she was learning to think before she spoke, something that didn’t come naturally.

  At that moment, Ben walked down the stairs knotting his light blue tie. Had he heard? Would Jayden back down now that his dad was here?

  Ben looked from Tessa to Jayden. Tessa’s heart began to pound.

  “Have I missed something?” Ben slipped the knot in his tie up to his neck and adjusted his shirt collar. He looked so smart in his slim fitting dark trousers and tailored shirt. Tessa lifted her eyebrows and gave him an appreciative smile. In her simple summer shift and orange wedges, she felt a little under-dressed. But that wasn’t the issue at hand. Jayden’s church attendance was of far greater importance.

  Jayden didn’t answer. Should she ignore what he’d told her, or tell Ben? Was this another of Jayden’s tests? She’d certainly become warier ever since the Neil issue. She inhaled deeply and made her decision.

  “Jayden doesn’t want to come to church.” She held her breath before glancing at Jayden. The accusing look he was giving her said it all.

  Ben turned sharply and faced Jayden. “How many times have we gone through this, Jayden? You’re not old enough to make your own decision yet. You’re coming, like it or not.” Ben’s voice was softer than in the past, but Jayden cast him a dirty look and picked up one of the dog’s leads before throwing it on the floor. “Fine. But don’t expect me to listen to any of that God stuff.” He
stormed off up the stairs.

  Ben started to follow him but Tessa grabbed his arm. “Let me go, Ben. Is that okay?”

  Ben hesitated.

  “Please, Ben. You’re too wound up.” Tessa rubbed his arm gently and prayed he’d calm down.

  He let out a slow breath and ran his hand through his hair. “You’re right, Tess. You go. I’m not in the right frame of mind.”

  Tessa reached up and kissed him on the cheek. “I won’t be long.” She let go of his hand and walked slowly up the stairs, pausing in front of Jayden’s door. Lord God, please give me wisdom to know what to say. Let Jayden see your love in me, and soften his heart, I pray.

  When Tessa came back down the stairs with a smile on her face several minutes later, Ben looked at her quizzically. “What did you say to him?”

  “Don’t be upset, but I told him if he goes to church every Sunday for a month, we’ll take him and Neil away camping for a weekend.” She put a hushing finger to Ben’s lips as he started to object. “He agreed, so just be happy, Mr Straight and Narrow.” She flashed him a cheeky grin and stifled a laugh at the surprised look on his face. “Besides, a weekend away camping will be fun. How long has it been since you’ve been camping?”

  Ben drew in a deep breath and averted his gaze. “Never.”

  “Never? Really? Well, it’s about time you did.”

  Ben looked up. “I’m not sure I agree with bribing him to go to church, Tessa.” He had that serious look in his eyes again. He really is Mr Straight and Narrow sometimes.

  “I wouldn’t call it a bribe, Ben. More a reward. And Jayden’s coming to church happily. Isn’t that worth it?”

  Ben sighed heavily. “I’m not sure I like the way you went about it, Tess. It sounds like a bribe to me,” Ben said seriously. “I want Jayden to go to church and come to know God just as much as you do. I’ve been praying about it for years, but I’m not comfortable with this. I want him to go because he wants to, not because he’s being bribed.”

  Tessa took a step back. “So do I, Ben, but that’s not going to happen right now in his frame of mind. Isn’t it better that he comes willingly, for whatever reason? When I look at Jayden, I see a hurting kid, and I don’t think you’re doing much to change that by being so tough on him.”

  “Is that what you think, Tessa?”

  Tessa opened her mouth but nothing came out. They were arguing again, and just before church. Tears pricked her eyes and she willed them not to come out as she glanced away.

  “We should have discussed this first before you offered him something we hadn’t agreed on.”

  Tessa cringed at his words. Jayden came down the stairs before she could respond. She’d completely stuffed up again. When would she learn? But Ben would never have agreed if they’d discussed it first. Why couldn’t he see that what she’d done was okay?

  “I’m ready.” Jayden had changed into a pair of clean jeans and a plain button down shirt, but his cap was still firmly planted on his head. He looked at his dad and then at Tessa.

  Tessa was determined not to let him see there was any problem between the two of them.

  “Hey Jayden, that’s better. Let’s go.” She placed a hand on his shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. Ben would just have to be happy Jayden was coming to church. They’d deal with their problem later.

  Tessa tried to make small talk on the short drive to church to cover the simmering tension between Ben and her. Ben was right—she should have discussed it with him first before suggesting something this important. But she couldn’t ignore the fact that Jayden was sitting in the back of the car in a better mood.

  Tessa reached out her hand and squeezed Ben’s leg gently. He didn’t respond. He just looked at the road ahead, his profile stiff and rigid. Tessa’s heart fell. Oh, God, I don’t want to go to church like this. Please help.

  Chapter 6

  As they arrived at the carpark of the Fellowship Bible Church, Tessa was tempted to ask Ben to turn around and drive home. How could they enter a house of God when all was not right between them? Why wasn’t Ben happy that Jayden had willingly come to church with them? Okay, she’d promised him a weekend away camping with Neil, but surely that was worth it. What was Ben’s problem?

  Ben climbed out, closed his door with more force than necessary, and strode around to open her door. Tessa inhaled deeply. She hated it when things weren’t right between them. Could she do this? Walk into a new church, amongst people she didn’t know, and pretend all was well? For Jayden’s sake, she had to. Tears stung Tessa’s eyes. She’d never in her wildest dreams imagined she and Ben would be at loggerheads over Jayden coming to church. Maybe her mum had been right and being a wife and mother to a teenager was harder than she ever thought it would be. But she had to pull herself together. She wiped her eyes, took a deep, slow breath, then fixed a smile on her face before taking Ben’s hand and walking into the church that on the outside looked more like a warehouse than a place of worship.

  At Gracepointe, old familiar hymns played on an organ welcomed everyone to worship. Here, a band belted out modern worship songs. What would Ben think? Being the ultra conservative accountant that he was, surely he’d prefer the older, more conservative type of service they were both used to. Jayden, on the other hand, was more likely to feel comfortable with this type of music.

  Although they were a little early, the main auditorium was almost full. People were singing and clapping, and a warm sense of God’s spirit filled the place. An older couple welcomed them at the door and directed them to some seats towards the back. Tessa glanced at Ben and squeezed his hand. Surely he’d let their disagreement go now they were in church. Her heart warmed when he returned her squeeze and placed his arm around her shoulder. Tessa snuggled in close and thanked God for intervening, and prayed they would be able to resolve their differences. The lyrics to the song were on the screen, and Tessa joined in the singing, and as she did, a spirit of renewal washed over her.

  ‘Give me grace to see beyond this moment here

  To believe that there is nothing left to fear

  And that You alone are high above it all

  You my God are greater still’

  It was so good to be back in church. Although Fellowship Bible Church was larger than Gracepointe and definitely more contemporary, maybe, just maybe, they could make this place their spiritual home. Amid the excitement of her engagement to Ben, the romantic wedding and their subsequent honeymoon, she hadn’t been to church for several weeks, and with everything that had happened already, it was good to be reminded of God’s constant grace. Above all the problems at home and at the clinic, God was greater still.

  Long after the time of corporate prayer was finished, Tessa sat with bowed head. Her spirit had been moved by the worship and the prayer time, but she needed God to touch her deeper still, and so she poured her heart out to God. Oh God, thank you for being here with me right now. I’m sorry for being so distant of late, and for trying to do things in my own strength. I knew being married wouldn’t be a walk in the park, but I didn’t think it would be this complicated. We’ve had one argument too many, and all over Jayden. Maybe Mum was right and I’m not ready to raise a teenager. Doing so...or trying to do so...is causing so many problems between Ben and me, and that’s the last thing I want right now. Tessa’s heart was heavy, and she was so lost in prayer and busy sorting out her thoughts with God that she barely heard any of the sermon. Whatever the pastor said, however, must have touched Ben for he squeezed her hand several times. Looking up, she forced herself to focus on the last part of the sermon.

  The pastor, a blonde-haired, youthful-looking man in his early forties, was preaching on “Love in spite of...” He read from 1 Peter 4:8. Tessa knew the verse well. She said it quietly to herself, “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins.”

  “To love God and to love one another are the greatest commandments given to us by God. If we believe that God is perfect and good and
holy, which he is, then it is easy to love him. But to love imperfect human beings with all their sins and foibles, that can be tough. It’s natural to judge people for their weaknesses and faults, but if we follow the example of Christ, we’ll find it easier to love others the way he loves us.

  “How does Christ love us? He loves us in spite of ourselves. He loves us in spite of our sins, faults, failures, and stuff ups. He loves us unconditionally. This deep love gave him the strength to die on the cross so that our multitude of sins could be covered, and that deep love still abides today. When we don’t act the way God wants us to act, does he turn his back on us? No. When we say careless words, does he stop his ears to our prayers? I don’t think so. He just goes right on loving us in spite of all that, and we must do the same to the people who are in our lives. We must love our bosses, employees or co-workers in spite of the fact they are difficult to get along with. We must love our spouses in spite of the fact they aren’t perfect. We must love our children in spite of their occasional disobedience. God wants us to love one another deeply, in spite of...”

  Tessa couldn’t think of a more timely message. As they stood for the closing song, she prayed that God would help her love Ben and Jayden the way he loved her. With Ben’s arm around her shoulder, peace settled in Tessa’s heart, along with hope that all would be well with her, Ben and Jayden.

  The pastor hurried to the back of the sanctuary when the service ended. He shook hands with each member of the congregation as they began to file out. He greeted Ben and Tessa with a broad smile. “I’m guessing you must be new.”

  Ben returned the pastor’s smile and shook his hand. “Yes, we just moved to the area and this is our first time.”

  “Welcome, glad you decided to worship with us this morning. I’m Fraser Stanthorpe, by the way.”

  “I’m Ben and this is my wife, Tessa.” Ben turned to Tessa and placed his hand behind her back. “Our son, Jayden—” Ben looked to his other side, but Jayden wasn’t there.